I have been out for the past while, I apologize. I have been busy with summer, "church" responsibilities, family, etc... I know that you may think, "why is he volunteering for the LDS church?" My answer is that my local leaders know my feelings. They have no answers. The reason, I'm trying to save a marriage and my family. It sucks to be me. I must tell you, in my current calling in the LDS church, I'm careful to not spread the lies that I was taught when I was young.
This brings me to my "nail in the coffin" on whether the church was true. This was the clincher for me. After finding this out and really thinking about it, I now understand how the foundation of the LDS is corrupted and based on a lie. A lie that has damaged good people in the past and continues to do so everyday.
A lie that, I assume, the upper leadership knows about. If I know then they MUST know but continue to peddle out the same "teachings" every year. I was always taught that those who leave the church can never leave it alone. I assumed that those who leave are bitter because they were offended or wanted to sin. But I am bitter because I found out the real truth and when I bring it up with others, including my wife, I have been accused of "losing the spirit, being deceived by Satan, or proud. Never mind that maybe I found facts that show the mormon church isn't what it claims to be.
In 3 Nephi 26:6-12, moroni writes about the plates of Nephi and everything he was including on those plates. Moroni then claims in Moroni 10:1-5 about how he sealed up the plates and that by reading them and praying people can find out if they are true. 1 Nephi 1:2 Nephi tells he is making a record in a mixture of Hebrew and Egyptian or as Joseph Smith said "reformed Egyptian". Joseph took a sample of the ancient characters to Dr. Anthon to show that they were "authentic".
I'm about in my mid-forties. My "prophet" growing up was Ezra T. Benson. His whole push in the church was the Book of Mormon. He claimed during general conference it is the keystone to our church. A keystone is at the top an arch and holds everything together. All the paintings used in the official church manuals and ensign show Joseph looking at a set of gold plates. Children are taught from early age that the gold plates were used and Joseph translated them with the urim and thummin, an old testament reference.
There is the scenario. The background, the foundation of doctrine in the LDS church. What is a member suppose to do when they read that Joseph never even looked at the plates but put a brown stone in a hat and held it up to his face. That is how the Book of Mormon came about. That crumbles the church at its core for two reasons. First; the church lied and misrepresented how Joseph brought forth the book. If I am expected to be honest, than shouldn't my religious organization be held to the same standard? The church can lie to me, a run of the mill member, but I must be honest in all my dealings with my fellow man. Second; Joseph using a rock in a hat is no different than me using a Milton Bradley Ouija board to make up some translation. Actually I wouldn't even define what Joseph did as translation because he didn't look at the plates, I would call it a "revelation". That is a completely different thing. Now we are calling into question whether he made it all up, was high on drugs or completely drunk.
My keystone has fallen and have realized the church for what it is, a business that burdens that backs of its members. Am I mad? Hell yes. Can I leave the church alone? Hell no. Because it isn't a church it is a business, a fraud and needs to be exposed.
Sorry for the rant,