I am starting a second blog to voice my frustrations and concerns about my church. I have no other source for venting these issues so writing about them may help in working through these questions. So I must admit this is a selfish blog, one that is more for me than anyone else. If I have no follows, so be it.
I must let everyone know that I am an active member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I currently hold a temple recommend. I have served a full time mission, worked in various positions in the church such as Elders Quorum President, counselor in EQ, Young Men's counselor, Executive secretary to the Bishop, ward mission leader, Sunday school teacher, etc...I have been a life long member, have had an active temple recommend since I was 19. I am now in my forties, still attend church and try to go to the temple twice a month.
The unraveling of the church for me started with the City Creek Center project. I have struggled with this for the last year. I find it interesting that a church that is suppose to be the "true church" of Jesus Christ has spent an estimated 1-3 billion dollars on a shopping mall to "revitalize" downtown.
When I voiced my concerns to other members, they begin to defend the project by saying, "well Crossroads was old", "it can bring more people to Temple Square", " I really like it". The concern is that when members are struggling to pay their tithing, especially those of other poorer nations while the "pure and delightsome" members in Utah get a brand new shiny mall.
Are we a church or a business? 3 billion?, but "tithing funds were not used". However, at some point tithing funds were used to begin the purchasing of assets that the church owns. These "sacred" funds have been used in the past to fund multiple projects eventually leading to the Church's "crown jewel" of City Creek Center.
3 Billion, what on earth cost 3 Billion in that mall? Are streets paved with gold? Is there replica of the Hill Cumorah? I mean seriously where did all that money go? I hope it wasn't siphoned off and used to stuff the pockets of the higher ups or used in other projects similar to the Beneficial Life fleecing. We don't hear about that in Sunday School. These projects make me nervous, as members we have no way to find out. The church has closed the books since the 1950's, thus no accountability. From the Church's perspective, at least it doesn't have to issue dividends to it's members.
I don't like the hidden agendas, the "lying for the Lord". A recent example of this was the BBC documentary of the Church. When the church's PR representative, claiming he didn't know what the Strengthening the Members Committee was, then when pushed said he needed to get the interviewer to the right person. Also, President Holland wasn't completely honest when he failed to answer the questions about the blood oaths in the Temple. We can't expect to have the Lord's blessing unless we act like the Lord's servants. The lying and lying by omission has to stop. It is ruining the faith of the members, whose backs uphold the church. The more I find out the more I struggle with what I find. Oh and by the way I am still waiting for that dividend.